Grammar Help For Cover Letter?
As a 2007 graduate of *********University, I have had a wonderful student teaching experience on the kindergarten level. I am certified in elementary and early childhood education. Currently, I am working with special needs students as a personal care assistant in the **************School District.
I am committed to professional growth as well as influencing my students to foster a lifetime love of learning. I want to teach children because I will play a vital role in the development of my students. The children’s experiences during their elementary years shape their views of themselves and the world, and will certainly affect later progress in school, work, and their personal lives.
I would like the opportunity to use best instructional practices, teamwork (with students, parents, staff, administration, community…), and my passionate and nurturing spirit to help this already high-achieving district reach new heights.
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Posted On: Jun 9th, 2009 at 12:05 pm
Put hyphen b/t “student teaching” in first line. I think “at” the kindergarten level.
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As a 2007 graduate of *********University, I have wonderful student teaching experience at the kindergarten level. I am certified both in in Elementary Education and Early Childhood Education. Currently I am working with special needs students as a Personal Care Assistant in the **************School District.
I am committed to professional growth to help my students foster a lifetime love of learning. My primary goal is to teach children by playing a vital role in their development. The children’s experiences during their elementary years shape their views of themselves and their place in the world and will certainly affect later progress in school, work, and personal lives.
I would like the opportunity to use best instructional practices, teamwork (with students, parents, staff, administration, and the community. My passion and nurturing spirit will foster this already high-achieving district reach new heights -
My suggestions are as follows:
[deletes in brackets]
SUGGESTIONS IN CAPS
[COMMENTS IN CAPS AND BRACKETS]
Good luck on getting this job.
As a 2007 graduate of *********University, I have had a wonderful student teaching experience IN [on the] kindergarten [level]. I am certified in elementary and early childhood education. Currently, I AM A PERSONAL CARE ASSISTANT FOR [am working with] special needs students [as a personal care assistant] in the **************School District.
I am committed to professional growth AND [as well as] influencing [my] YOUNG students to foster a lifetime love of learning THROUGH [AND GIVE SOME CONCRETE EXAMPLES]. [I want to teach children because I will play a vital role in the development of my students. The children’s experiences during their elementary years shape their views of themselves and the world, and will certainly affect later progress in school, work, and their personal lives.] [ALL OF THE LAST PART IS UNNECESSARY AS YOU ALREADY CONVEYED SOME OF IT AND THE REST IS WELL KNOWN.]
I would like the opportunity to use best instructional practices [WHAT IS BEST INSTRUCTIONAL PRACTICES? TOO GENERAL. IF YOU ADD THE CONCRETE EXAMPLES I SUGGEST ABOVE, YOU CAN REFER TO THEM HERE AND MAKE A GOOD TRANSITION TO THIS PARAGRAPH] AND teamwork [(]with students, parents, staff, administration, AND community[…),]PERIOD [and] I BELIEVE my passionate and nurturing spirit WILL SUPPLEMENT WELL [to help] this already high-achieving district [råeach new heights]. PLEASE SEE MY ATTACHED RESUME.
I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU. THANK YOU FOR CONSIDERING ME. [Our young learners of today are the leaders of tomorrow, so please call me today so we can schedule an interview and I can help these future leaders succeed and become responsible members of society.] -
Your last paragraph needs help. You can certainly “use best practices”, take out “instructional”. But you don’t “use” teamwork, you are a team player. and you don’t “use” your passionate and nurturing spirit, you have those things. I am a teacher–you need to add something unique to your letter. Everyone says those things. They are looking for something different. You have to be tough, dedicated, flexible, a yes-person, and be able to stay organized and focused to be a good teacher.